3 Levels of Ministry

1. Contact (Impress)
2. Impact (Engage)
3. Drive (Inspire)

I don't know how biblical this is going to be, I'm just going explain some practicalities of my ministry. It comes down to an analysis of my work that says that if I want to be most effective then I need to be clear about how I am spending my time. Even if you are not in ministry (or even a Christian) then I hope that this would be useful simply from the point of view of looking at how you spend your time.

I have lots and lots of different things that I have to do because of my job and they are all generally enjoyable. Some of them suit my personality really well and others I really have to really dig deep for the motivation. That's not a good enough reason to do or to not do something. Jesus calls people to carry a cross, which is neither motivating or personality aligning. I do think that in ministry that there are things that really help to achieve goals and some thing that simply reduce your effectiveness. This is why I like to analyze my time and categorize it and I'm sure you could come up with different categories, but these are the ones that work for me. I've also come up with three action words for the categories to focus my efforts - its a what and a how.

So let me explain...

Contact Contact work is just where you are trying to make contact with someone or a group of people or a community. It's about recognition and about setting up some trust. The key word I use here is Impress, and that's not something you normally think about with Christians, but people want to know that they can trust you and that you can do things for the next stage to work. It's not necessarily impress as in be able to juggle whilst walking a tightrope. It might be that you try to demonstrate some integrity, that you understand where someone is coming from, that you are thinking about others or just that you are punctual. It's not about being whizbang - it's about breaking down barriers and assumptions with a positive impression.

 

The kinds of things I do as contact work are leading services, saying hi to students every morning, trying to have high standards, helping people with their little IT problems (fix a printer here, demonstrate a shortcut there, embed a video in a powerpoint, turn up to an event that I'm not required to). I want people to have the impression that I care about others, that I am professional and that I have some insight. I don't want people thinking that I am judgmental, arrogant, sloppy or unreliable. Nor do I want people to take me for granted.

 

There are a couple of risks in all of this. You can't be a people pleaser and do good ministry. You have to be genuine and have integrity, and not just try to fit in. Jesus said that we have to be salt and light - you can't make a difference if you are like everybody else. You have to pick your battles, and pick your lines because you want people to see that they can relate to you, and you certainly don't want people to think that you are one of those "Holier than thou" types. But you don't want to be drinking, swearing, talking about chicks, putting others down etc so that people welcome you into the community. In some cases it's a fine line and in other cases its not. Also, you don't want your ministry to focus on you as a celebrity - it always has to point to Jesus. You can do good things, and impress people, but as soon as you start thinking that it's because you are good, and because you have worked hard, then you are ignoring that it was God who gave you the opportunity to minister to those people, it was God who gave you those gifts and talents and it is God who softens people's hearts. Always bring it back to Jesus. It doesn't have to be that every time you do some tiny little thing you use it to mention Jesus, but in your mind you must be really clear who deserves the glory.

The other big issue is mistake is to think that if people are showing up then they are growing up... Or at least developing some faith. Just because you have consistent numbers doesn't mean they are actually numbers of growing believers or going through faith development. You just don't know from contact ministry. A pastor in a church of 100 can know where most of his flock are because a whole bunch will be from the same families and a lot will be mature enough to sustain themselves, but take a school or a youth group and you have a lot of individuals not families. You also have a lot of showing up but no test of genuine commitment. That doesn't mean it's nor there but you just don't know unless you're actively growing it. Numbers don't equal faith growth and formation.

For that you need to make an impact

 

Impact
Occurs when you have individuals who are sufficiently challenged in their faith to grow more. A lot of the time this can happen through some of the initial contact work raising questions. Impact gives the opportunity to answer those questions. The relationship that was started through contact now means that some of your answers will be believed just because you say and some will be accepted because you have demonstrated trustworthiness. Whatever the case you need to engage the person and in particular their heart. A lot of people think that given enough information anyone will change. It's not true of weightloss or smoking so why should it be true for Christianity? It's not a transference of information - it's all about transformation. That requires good information that is worded appropriately for the audience and uses examples that they can relate to. And that is the key to it too - relevance. You are guaranteed to have no impact on anyone's heart whilst you are discussing irrelevant issues or using irrelevant examples. The listener needs to see themselves as a part of the whole fabric that you weave and they need to see that if it is relevant to them, then they need to respond in some way. If they do not respond, or if there is no action, then it's the same as someone clicking like on Facebook.

 

One of the major issues here is that what might work brilliantly on one group might be a disaster for another. An example that had lots of people responding for years, might completely miss the mark just because.

 

I watched a DVD about a guaranteed method for street evangelism based around convincing people that they were guilty of breaking the ten commandments. He would then work on convincing them that they needed a saviour. Unfortunately in this day and age, when most people have relative morals rather than absolute and most people don't have concept of a good and perfect God, the ten commandments aren't convincing. Maybe people who grew up in Sunday school theory years ago then drifted away and then got challenged in the street respond but most of the people I know who aren't Christians could at the very least point out that God takes lives (and that is enough for then to keep rejecting God).

The method has to be relevant. The gospel is always true but there is so much to it that we need to choose very carefully what we decide to share first and how we choose what we emphasize (which should be based on audience and not our own preferences). I heard a preacher once say that if he only had an hour to share the gospel with a person, he'd listen for 55minutes and spend the last five minutes applying the gospel. I think we actually need to start with God and Jesus. God is all about love and we need to get to know (follow) Jesus so that we can do what God wants. Its pretty basic and it doesn't mention sin - its a starting point and its not interested in a quick convert. Enough said.

 

Some other things to consider would be things like music/videos and Google. Music has a massive impact on emotions. Done well and it tugs on our heartstrings, badly and we get angry or worse "tune out". I've had non Christian kids singing chapel songs during "normal" classes or complaining that its stuck in their head. I've observed the opposite as well.

A very good friend of mine taught me that a 5minute clip from a movie can be very powerful in making a point. There are lots of movies with the hero who dies / gives his life / volunteers for a dangerous mission that can be related to Jesus or linked to God. I've also used whole movies split into parts for analysis and even linking to bible study - young people (especially) have unusually high tolerance for "boring stuff" when you link it to a movie. Part of it is wanting to know how it ends and part of it is that linking two different things in your head can be quite fun. We need to be honest here though - the Hollywood version of reality is a long way from real but has a significant impact on an audience because of a "willing suspension of disbelief." This can be manipulated. Don't.

Previous generations have relied on experts to give them information but this current generation has access to all the knowledge of the world at their fingertips. There are plenty of contexts in which the current generation still relies on experts to give information, but they tend to be relationally based. For example, the local GP that they see regularly will be able to tell them all kinds of information that will be instantly taken as gospel but a doctor on TV will be ignored. A panel of journalists on TV like "the project" or "Sunrise" will be highly influential (because they will be watched regularly and seem very personal) but the political experts that appear on TV during elections are wrong if they present a different point of view. Mostly, Google is god. And of Google, only the first page counts. The new generation has a much better relationship with Google than it has with plenty of experts because its the go to search page. (Bing does not count for anything FYI.) This does not make sense to previous generations because good doesn't actually have information - it simply knows where to find it, but it still gets the credit. Therefore, to get the new generation on board with whatever information you want them to assimilate, all you need is to help them with their Google searches. This can be manipulated too (so don't) but as the post Christian age develops further, the number of responses that will be from a Christian perspective will also diminish (only the first page of Google counts principle). Ultimately, if you want them to believe it, get them to search it and make up their own mind.

 

YouTube is another source of information that is widely accepted without much critical thinking. Once again, the current generation spends a lot of time on YouTube (app more than site I'm sure) so there is a relationship there, even if that trust is built around epic fail videos and cats.

I remember a long time ago being told as a teacher that our vocabulary needed to be complex so that the students would develop a greater understanding of technical terms and complex language structures - for a class that you have all day this can be useful in an academic school, however explanations and definitions need to be used regularly. Everyone knows what it would feel like to go and sit in a lecture for an unknown topic (like neurology or physics or accounting) and feel like an idiot because you do t understand half of the words used (let alone the jargon and acronyms). Imagine what its like for a kid who has never been to church to hear jargon like grace, blood of the lamb, the cross, redemption, sacrifice and sin. Even if the word sounds familiar, they would never have heard it in that context before and yet some Christians just blurt it out as if everyone went to Sunday school. To have an impact on his audience Jesus used parables with familiar themes like sheep, farming and fishing. If we don't change them to be about themes that our audience is used to we are missing one of the points of parables - help people understand God.

 

Final point on this - the bible is full of richness and depth. Pick what is appropriate - if your audience has been taught that they are good from an early age then trying to convince them that "they are all sinners" might not be as effective as trying to convince them that God is "Our heavenly father". The gospels give us examples of judges, sons, sheep, tax collectors, military men, fishermen, Pharisees, " sinful women" and people who had a mouth. There must be something in the bible that you can use that will be directly relevant (don't just say tax collector - say drug dealer or someone who lives for money) to whoever you are talking to. It takes more knowledge of who you are talking to and more preparation, but it is more effective... It will have a greater impact.

 

In the first phase you need to impress to connect and get the platform for them to listen to you. In the second phase you need to use that platform to engage them with a relevant message, not a soap box topic or your go-to topic or anything that leads them away from what is important. Don't see this as the place for the ministry outcomes either. People don't really engage with the gospel 'em mass most of the time. Real conversion is so easy to avoid when there is a crowd to hide in... Which brings us to drive...

 

Drive

The third phase is the hardest, most time consuming and most rewarding... Kind of like parenting. Within that group that you engage there will be a handful that really respond. They'll be the ones asking questions during their time, they will seek you out for more, they will clarify and extrapolate further. The drive is not a sledgehammer driving a post or a golfer driving off the tee - its a road trip. You get a few to go places. The vehicle is a regular location and time with a few who are interested. The fuel is joy of hanging out (and sometimes food)(snacks involving lots of sugar if absolutely necessary) but the view is focused on the beauty of the bible. Explore it, explain it, go to new places, go to old favourites, bring snacks (I already mentioned snacks didn't I... they're not that important...).

Don't let it be formal, snooty and onesided. It needs to be organic, relaxed, inclusive and above all challenging. You need to prepare and train more than they do. You need to have something worth sharing. Once again there is the risk of the cult of you, so you definitely need to keep the focus on Jesus - let him be your guiding light and there's. Do not be the expert - be the one who cares enough about their future and wanting be there for their present. Be interested in them. It maybe that none of them ever become Christians because of your words of wisdom, but it is possible that they will connect with God because you took an interest in them which meant that they got interested in what you were on about. The holy spirit does the work, and Jesus does the saving, but you have the opportunity to bring them closer than ever before; sometimes by answering questions, sometimes by being there/dependable, and sometimes by simply being yourself.

 

This is where hearts are truly changed. This is where God's word can really sink in and transform lives. It is always precious and should never be taken for granted. You still need to impress and you still need to engage, but nowhere near to the same level. Now you need to focus on inspiration. You want hearts and minds to be changed then make sure that there is something life changing on the table. Now maybe you don't feel to inspirational and you feel that this is for someone else to do - trust me, every single time someone says yes to taking out time from their lives to hang out with you, they already have seen something about you that is inspiring. You must be yourself - don't try and switch on the charm. If you want them to be genuine then you also have to be genuine - that doesn't mean overshare, that just means real. You must be yourself. The funny thing is that we probably don't find our inspiration all that often coming from within ourselves. Most of the time, our inspiration comes things we have seen, heard, read and experienced. You could be passing those things on or it could be that those who gather need to experience life with you to be inspired - you don't know how God is going to use you in that context so please do not say that you are not going to be inspirational. Don't let puff you up with pride either. Don't think that you inspire just by turning up so you don't need to think through exactly where this is going or how you are going approach the next session. Be real. Over and above all this you MUST remember that it is the inspiration of the Holy Spirit that does the most important work - you get to be a servant of our LORD Jesus Christ for just a few precious minutes and you get to pass on to others what has been passed on to you. If you do not understand fully the work of the Holy Spirit then don't worry - you're not alone. If you do not believe that the Holy Spirit does the work or that the Holy Spirit isn't necessary or it's not what your denomination talks about, then you need to read the bible some more.

 

If you are in a position where you can train people to do this then do it. You will have more effect over a longer period of time if you are not the only one doing this where you are. Train them, give them experiences where you are supervising, give them feedback on their progress, listen to their feedback, share resources, share their joys and their frustrations.

Wrap Up

Jesus sent out disciples in pairs. God said, it is not good for man to be alone. The Trinity is God in community with himself. Aloneness is what connectedness in society leads to when connectedness is about me. God puts us in other people's lives for a reason. Not to be the guru that knows all the answers, but to be the friend, guide and at times, father/mother. If you are in organised ministry then you will face the issue of where you are spending the majority of your time and if you know your New Testament well enough, you will know that you need to be fruitful. To be fruitful you have to carve out time to at least walk alongside people if not disciple people. Everything in life will tell you that you are successful if you have lots of people turn up to contact ministry, and contact ministry can be the most time consuming part of your life if you let it... but whatever work you do make sure you are working towards the Drive.

Why did the kids in Jericho have to die

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The four key questions for life

This is based on something I heard on the radio a few years ago, and haven't been able to get an Australian version of.

1) Am I loveable?
2) Am I noticed?
3) Do I have a future?
4) Am I needed?

My reason for posting this is simply to encourage all adults to address their own answers and to reach out to any kids who might be struggling with any of these questions - You might be the one who makes the difference in a kid's life.

These four questions basically come in four to five year stages. The kids who come into adulthood with these questions firmly answered are most likely to be emotionally secure and motivated to achieve. Sometime people will answer these questions sequentially, and sometimes they will get the answer to one question and then skip the next and then go back. Essentially though, if the answer to any of these questions is "No" then the outlook for a kid is bleak and their motivation towards anything is going to be mixed. It is going to affect their outlook and their behaviour in certain circumstances. For example, what point is there for a kid who doesn't think they are noticed to try hard at school for an award? What point is there for a kid is there for a kid to reach out to others if they feel unnecessary and unneeded?

I believe that God made parents to be the ones that answer these questions for kids, but that doesn't always happen. In the real world, parents have limitations, parents struggle with their own answers to these questions, and life happens. It takes a village to raise a child, and sometimes the parents aren't able to, or don't know how to make the needed changes to help, so we should all be on the look-out for kids who are struggling. The reason why it's best if the parent answers it, is because the rest of society provides conditional answers. For example, if your answer to "Am I needed?" is yes, because you have a job and the manager says, "I don't know what I'd do without you." then that's great until you lose your job or move onto another job in which they don't make you feel as needed. If a kid believes that they are noticed, because they were put into beauty pageants between the ages of 5-12 but then they nolonger make the cut, then it's quite likely that they will start attention seeking behaviour. It's not a hard and fast rule; it's just an ideal. Every kid and every family and every parent is different. Hopefully this will just get you thinking.

1) Am I loveable?

The first four to five years are spent grappling with the question "Am I loveable?" Not am I cute and cuddly, but am I such a person that is capable of being loved? If that question is answered positively, then it has a huge impact on a kid's ability to deal with all kinds of changes to do with people like new settings, (like kindy and school) new people, and new siblings. Ideally, parents should be spending lots of time with 0-5 year olds, hugging them, laughing with them, feeding them and encouraging them. When kids misbehave (which happens a lot) parents need to set the boundaries of what is right and wrong. It's these kinds of things which answer the question "Am I loveable" because if parents continue to demonstrate love in the face of bad behaviour when the kid is young, then they start to realize that they are loved no matter how naughty they are. This is unconditional love; it's hard to do it right so that kids get the right correction to the behaviour without getting a sense that they can get away with anything, and without getting the sense that they can do nothing right.

If the answer by the end of 5 years is "I am loveable," then new will be approached positively. Meeting a new person is met with an expectation that the relationship will be positive, and going to a new school is exciting because they expect that they will be loved - not in the same way as parents - but just that expectation is for good, and they know that if it all goes wrong they can retreat back to loving parents.

Now I have three kids and they are all different, even though my wife and I have parented them in the same way. Their personalities mean that they respond differently to all kinds of things. My second son struggles with this question at times, and that has meant that settling into Prep has taken time, and there have been ups and downs. That doesn't mean that I haven't done a good job, but more that his personality is affected by a range of extra things in new situations. Even though he is no less loved, he needs to ask the question more frequently, and get reminded more frequently.

2) Am I noticed?

Ever felt invisible? Some kids spend their whole lives feeling invisible. The quiet ones, the ones with lots of siblings, the ones who aren't academic or sporting geniuses all struggle with this question. And it's not just getting praise. Some kids get praised for things that they know aren't valuable - they reach a point where they wanted to come first, second, third, not well done for showing up. They want to be told "That was a great game you played today" when they didn't drop the ball everytime. Kids understand the truth from the age of 4 and want genuine evaluation from around the age of 6. That's not to say praise should be left for stellar performances, but we should be very careful as to what and how we give kids encouragement. A specific part of the game where they did the right thing, is much much better than praising the whole game in which things went right and things went wrong. Praising effort (which can eventually become demoralizing) instead of results. Identifying areas that could be worked on as an opportunity for more time together and recognizing that just because you don't get chosen, doesn't mean you weren't good. It's tricky, but failure is a part of life that kids need to be prepared for in a positive way and how they bounce back from what they see failures will have an impact on their motivation. If you aren't a part of that, then they can start to feel unnoticed and worthless. All that work done on answering the question about being loveable gets undermined, and habits about expectations always become negative. It's not a matter of preventing them from experiencing failure - its a matter of working out how to be alongside them. Too many parents will step in and get academic grades upgraded, teams reassessed, and performances influenced in a failed attempt to show their love. If a parent does this, then they are devaluing their kid, and ignoring their needs - which leads to the answer "Am I'm noticed" being only answered negatively, until the parents stop their interfering (Sometimes as late as the twenties) or makes the kid think "If they really noticed me then they would know that "maths" is not my strength."

Of course, some kids do not have anyone who does notice them. There might be lots of reasons for this, but at the end of the day we need to have eyes that see in particular marginalised, excluded or "loner" kids - it can lead to depression and suicide.

3) Do I have a future?

Ever noticed how when you ask kids what they want to do when they leave school, they often don't know? Sometimes its because they don't know if there is actually any point in trying hard because they don't know if they have a real future. 

In the adult world, we actually assume that we will be doing something similar to this year next year, or different next year based upon our current condition and control. Say for example you want to go on a big holiday, you will save, or you want to move house or renovate your house - you will get quotes, save, research or whatever it takes. You are assuming that next year will happen in a similar way to this year with sufficient knowns and not too many unknowns. Even Uni students and people who don't know if they are going to get the sack will act in a way that supports their future - even the choice of saving money because you think you might get the sack is a belief in the future.

The way in which kids think about their future is different to adults, mainly because of their experience. Year 2 follows year 1. Year 7 follows year 6. If you hate maths in primary school then you probably hate it in high school. It's like it's never going to change and never going to end.

Who can forgive them for believing that they have no future when there are so many unknowns and everyone who has done it before was older than them. But without hope, what will motivate them? Nothing good. But where do they get the idea of a future from? From interested adults who can show them possibilities. All it takes is options based on strengths, weaknesses and interests. Now you can direct some of these by presenting good options and by knowing about the kid. You can also give them experiences like work experience, volunteering somewhere, or responsibilities. It also means that adults need to know about the high school system (whether HSC or QCS) and uni courses and OPs and industries. It also means that the discussions adults have about the future need to happen regularly and positively, whilst accepting that knowing what to do is a process not something that you should make a kid feel bad about for not knowing the answer. 

Am I needed?

All the discussion about the future is fine, but at some point, kids do the maths and realise that they are just one of many. Whether its because they got rejected by the local Maccas for a job, whether they get beaten by most of the grade, or Uni cohort, or whether their friends are more popular, there is a constant question in a kid's mind about whether or not this massive world actually needs them, or whether or not they are just surplus.

I gotta mention God here: I believe that God made each one of us different and that we are all unique. I also believe that God made each of us with a very specific plan and a unique purpose. No matter where you are at with God, every single person has the potential to do something truly unique and truly spectacular. When kids are making the transition to adulthood, it often seems impossible. Providing them with examples of how you got your break, asking them questions about what they are passionate about or what problems they see in the world, really helps, but mostly, you just need to be there for them and constantly reassure them that life does get better.

These questions if they get answered properly when you are young can really affect you positively, particularly in your relationships and career. If any of them get answered negatively of don't get definitively answered, they can really hold you back, lead to rocky relationships, lead to a lack of motivation in studies, or any aspect of your life which requires confidence.

If this answer isn't cleared up by teenage years, then their relationships with their peers, both BFF and GF/BF, could be characterized by some behaviour that adults will look at in wonder. For example, girls who get continually treated terribly by guys and continues to choose boyfriends that treat her that way. That could be interpreted as "An example of how our consumer society has degraded morals" but it could just be a cry for love and to work out the answers.

So keep an eye out for which questions kids you see might be struggling with, think about how you answered those questions and what questions you haven't actually answered positively.

Finally, get a conversation going about it and see what happens

Cheers
Macca

When did Jesus start his ministry?

So you're probably thinking he was thirty, or it was around 30AD. You might also be thinking "what is ministry?"

I can't imagine the God I worship just being content to wait around till he was thirty - it just doesn't make sense. Jesus was amazing at using seemingly insignificant situations (often inconvenient to him) and even when he was under attack to gently and/or firmly point out Gods love, mercy, kindness, and (loaded word) grace and in so doing inspired, amazed, healed and restored more people than there are verses than are in the bible.

It doesn't say it but there is a healthy respect between John and his cousin long before the mention of sandal tying (just imagine the two young boys playing together and the older helping the younger put his sandals back on next to the sandpit) and Jesus asking to be baptized by him. There isn't a lot of info about his time of "growing up" except people's response to him and his lack of stranger danger in the temple at age 12, but surely he did not separate himself from his village and become a hermit? Surely he worked in the family business and studied the scriptures, but had a bit of a rep and experienced friendship.

But even before this

Children are a blessing from God and the longer a couple or a family wait for a kid, the greater the pressure on the mum during pregnancy and the greater the joy once the child is born. Once they are born there is lots of ooing and ahhhing and then mum and dad get on with the business of being being mum and dad (in whatever way works for them). This is often filled with plenty of sleeplessness but there are those beautiful moments which soothe the soul as the baby sleeps, or the baby's wraps around yours or the eyes open and the first smile forms.

Now imagine that the God of creation is born as a little helpless baby. No crying he makes is a bit of a stretch but you just know that baby Jesus' focus is going to be on communicating God's love right from the start in whatever he chooses and whatever way is going to be most readily understood to whoever is most readily available (shepherds, wise men, local choir).

Jesus ministry starts from his birth (maybe before if you count the whole thing with Elizabeth) and not when he was thirty. God had his reasons for getting those three action packed wisdom filled years recorded in the gospels and why the tales of teenage Jesus are scant, but he wasn't cut off in preparation.

So what?

Firstly, never underestimate the place of children in providing care, support, ministry and healing to the hurting - particularly not at Christmas. (By logically this also means empowering, training and equipping them but it also means giving them a sense of value and worth that goes beyond what they can do)

Secondly, follow Jesus' example of making every moment of every day count for God.

Thirdly, never ever forget the importance of the theology behind sharing our frail human form. He knows what it is to go through every aspect of our life from babyhood, to adulthood. Our responses should be appreciation, respect and trust. Every time we face dangers, troubles and frustrations we should be turning to God who became a baby for us because he loves us for he we are.

Merry Christmas
Cheers
Macca

Santa Claus vs God

Santa Claus knows everyone on the planet
God knows everyone on the planet

Santa Claus has thousands of people pretending to be him

God has thousands of people pretending to be him

Santa Claus has a plan to reach everyone in one night

God has a plan to reach everyone in one night

Santa Claus knows what everyone wants

God knows what everyone wants

Santa Claus understands that not everyone believes in him

God understands that not everyone believes in him

Santa Claus wants everyone to know love and joy at Christmas

God wants everyone to know love and joy at Christmas

Santa Claus loves surprising people 

God loves surprising people

Santa Claus doesn't exist

God exists

That's the real difference.

Being in love

How do you know if you are in love
Sweaty palms, pounding heart rate, heart in your mouth?
Maybe you spend all day thinking about them, planning what you are going to say next time you see them or talk to them, thinking about how lucky you are to have them in your life?
At Christmas you might make an extra effort - extra gifts, a really personal card and setting aside time to spend with that special someone.

One of the things that I was told when I got married was that being in love wasn't as important as loving your wife. That crazy in love feeling can subside as life takes over. The thrill of the initial romance can't last forever. The rollercoaster ride is replaced by a practical car which needs constant refueling. Communication is the key, which includes reading lots of books to understand the other better, and learning about their quirks, likes, dislikes, and spending time together.

For those of you who read this and are not Christian, here is something to think about...
God loves you, plans the gifts, makes time, thinks about you all the time. Not only that, but God will never, ever grow tired of being rejected, avoided or treated like He doesn't even exist.

For those of you who are Christians, here is something to think about...
When was the last time you got sweaty palms or a racing heart just thinking about God?
When was the last time you spent all day thinking about God, talking to God, or writing something special for God?

So maybe you're not in love with God? Maybe you're in a different phase of the relationship. Do you do loving things, even when you are tired, run down, worn out, for God, for others? Are you spending an hour a week with God or is it more? How much is in your tank? How often do you refuel?

Jesus said "love the Lord your God with all your heart, mind soul and strength." He added "Love your neighbour as yourself" with a definition of neighbour so broad as to encompass everyone.

No matter how hard I try to live up to this standard, I never feel like I spend more than 5% of my time getting close to this. It's too hard. I always fall short. This is why I constantly rely on God's grace.

The question is: if you can't achieve perfect love, should you stop trying? Should you accept where you are at with God and make no change? Or is time to suck it up and try knowing that the effort means something to God and will have a positive effect on your relationship with him.

Consider this
1 John 4:7-12
⁷ Dear friends, let us love one another, for love comes from God. Everyone who loves has been born of God and knows God.⁸ Whoever does not love does not know God, because God is love. ⁹ This is how God showed his love among us: He sent his one and only Son into the world that we might live through him. ¹⁰ This is love: not that we loved God, but that he loved us and sent his Son as an atoning sacrifice for our sins. ¹¹ Dear friends, since God so loved us, we also ought to love one another. ¹² No one has ever seen God; but if we love one another, God lives in us and his love is made complete in us.

http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=1+John+4&version=NIV


No matter who you are, God loves you, and you should show love to those are around you.

This is my speech for the year 12s leaving today

Tomato joke

There were three tomatoes walking down the road; A Mummy tomato, a Daddy tomato, and a baby tomato and the baby tomato was lagging behind ...

You guys dont know how much i will miss you

I have so many memories with you - some of them are funny and some of them are sad some of them funny and sad

I remember trying to keep up with kieran in cross country, form class in D2, no-outs soccer games on the junior campus oval, the day we got goals for futsal and my team putting them together, the worst camp ever with the bizare leader in the tree and the hail the size of a fist, being thrown in the pool by all of you and Robertson finally winning an interclan competition.

My fondest memories are from my first year at tsc with you guys in year 5. it is a different experience to have a class all day everyday as miss gilespie and mrs haines shipman will tell you. It makes you all very close (and a little insane)

we did slaves and masters, heaps of timestables and spelling, dissoling plastic, and buddy reading with the preps in mrs walkers class. We went from the squashed prep class to the massive classroom down the stairs.  We got to see wallabies out of the windows and we got trapped in the classroom during the bushfire because of the smoke.

But how much of this actually helped your OP? Id like to think some of things i did with all of you helped, but for me the most important test not one with letter results but your life. I hope that I have not only helped you work out your beliefs and demonstrated my own, but also shown you how important good relationships are.

There is a bible passage that talks about fire and seas (not the beach) and as you head off into the unknown i thought a bible verse might be appropriate. It talks about how no matter what challenges you face in life God is there for you so dont lose hope.

Isaiah 43:1-3 NIV

this is what the Lord says—
he who created you, Jacob,
he who formed you, Israel:
"Do not fear, for I have redeemed you;
I have called you by name; you are mine. When you pass through the waters,
I will be with you;
and when you pass through the rivers,
they will not sweep over you.
When you walk through the fire,
you will not be burned;
the flames will not set you ablaze. For I am the Lord your God,
the Holy One of Israel, your Saviour;

no accident

Kids repeat what you say. Often in public to people who wouldn't understand the context
Kids often look a bit like you and a bit like their mum/dad. Then they pull a face/expression and you just see yourself/relative/your own parents.


Parents tend not to be perfect. Kids tend to grow up and try and improve on what their parents did and often end up repeating a lot of what their parents did.

Parents tend to drive their kids crazy but kids tend to be attracted to someone who has some similarities to their parents.

What happens when parents aren't there for their kids?
What happens when parents haven't dealt with their own issues?
What happens when the kids have to work it out for themselves?
What happens when parents feel guilty about doing the right thing?
What happens when parents feel guilty about doing the wrong thing, but don't change what they are doing?

Kids are very resilient but ...
Parents have a huge opportunity so ...

Kids only learn manners, how to say sorry, and how to share if parents encourage and model using manners, saying sorry, and sharing.

There is only one perfect parent. God teaches us to ask for help, ask for forgiveness, and share what we've got. The rest of us are just doing the best we can, with the time that we have, so that our kids will grow up to be happy.

Every child is a blessing from God - especially mine!

Cheers
Macca

So you're new to church part 5... but by this stage you've been a bunch of times

Last stage of integrating a new person into a church

Couple of things to start off with...
First of all I'm not going to say that there is one perfect and get's 'em every single time kind of way to encourage new people to put down roots in a church. People are all different and churches are all different so there is going to be something for everyone. I'm just hoping that whoever is reading this blog realises/understands/agrees with me that it's not as simple as putting on a really good service, or making sure that we give you a name badge and adding you to the mailing list and database. It's a process that needs to capture the hearts and minds of everyone, not just the new people. It is also something that God is in control of, and you could have the best system and people might still leave the church after trying a couple of Sundays, and you could have the worst systems and people might stay...

second of all, it's really important everyone in a church is on board with this. Everyone does play a role - not just the two people who weren't at the meeting and got put on welcoming for a month of Sundays. It's also not up to the priest to be the one to attract and retain. The whole church family can play a positive or negative role. They just need to be empowered to do so...

The last part of welcoming new people to church is empowering them. This goes beyond giving them a job and a little responsibility. The empowerment of people is about giving them a sense that they can contribute to the church, not because I think we need to brainwash people or delude people but because the church needs everybody to contribute. Do I need to give you a bible reference to being one body and many parts? Do I need to make reference to the fact that churches are made of people not of bricks.

A small town priest can probably do the services, visit a few sick people, and do the occasional baptism/funeral/wedding. I'm pretty sure that the church in a small town could exist without the members of the church actually doing anything to contribute to the church. Churches in cities could also survive that way as long as the congregation size was kept small... what keeps them small? A small town mentality...? Is that why I think we should empower people? So that they make the church a better place? No.

It's about the person, not about the church.

I don't want to make a big deal out of it, but our society likes to tell people that they are worthless, so that they will buy something that will make them worth something, which doesn't, so they keep on buying stuff. The fact is that very few people are actually as incapable as they are made to feel. I see it all the time at school, kids believing that they are only capable of a C/pass. Or that they because they are not the sporty cool kid, then there is no hope for them.

We need to empower people to achieve what they are capable of ... for God.

We cannot have people just sitting in pews, because all humans are made in God's image. Humans can do amazing things. If they just sit in pews, for just one hour per week then it's like having a bunch of batteries sitting in the recharger and never putting them into the toy/camera/clock. It's like paying for a solar panel and then not connecting it to your power box. More importantly, each of those humans has been purpose built by God for a reason. They have gifts and they have experiences that God has given them for a reason... and that purpose is for God's kingdom.

Empowering is abut encouraging people to do what God wants them to do in ministry. If they've been trained, equiped and have had enough experience then they should be looking for a niche, a problem, a need and working out a solution so they aren't doing all that training for nothing. It's then up to the person or people in charge to say "Go for it!" ... obviously moulding and shaping the outcome so that it builds the church rather than leads to problems. Making sure that there are proper checks and balances is important. Making sure the person doesn't bite off more than the and end up burning out is also important.

The thing is that God wants us all to be in this. It's not as if he sent his son to die for us so that could just sit there and be grateful for one hour a week.

Now the question is, if you got this far through my extremely long blog - BTW deliberately long - have you been empowered by your church? Are you encouraged to be a part of the building process, or are you just pew warming? Are you given all the training you need to take on something in the church which  makes a difference to the lives?

Am I saying that you need to go and start taking over the church? No. This needs to be done under the authority of whoever is in charge of your church - no matter how terrible they might be.

So, if you are new to a church, go and get empowered. If you are not new but have been hanging out there for a while, find someone who needs to be trained, equipped and empowered.

So there you go. You want people to come to your church and stay in your church for all the right reasons. You want them to use their God given gifts and talents, feel appreciated and make something of their time in the church.

No church is perfect, but every single church, even the one's that drive you crazy, belong to God. We owe it to God make sure we don't drive people away. I don't claim to be the absolute expert on this subject, but I hope that wherever you are reading this you have been able to take something away from it and that people in your church will benefit.

Cheers
Macca

Not moving to Springfield

At the beginning of the year, Em and I started looking at the possibility of moving to Springfield. The main attraction was a flat back yard and a larger house for a similar amount of money for what we could sell our house for. It was a family move, a lifestyle change and it had a lot of advantages.

I must point out there was a timeline to this that was all about *the baby*. I worked out exactly how long we had to get a contract if the contract was x many weeks and if I didn't want us moving within x many weeks of the baby so that Em was not stressed or tired by it. I was being practical.

Being faithful Christians we prayed to God about it. Those prayers went something along the lines of "God, do you want us to move to Springfield? If so, show us the house and get us a buyer for our house." I think it would be fair to say that I have often said that God has a plan for everyone and we were trying to work that plan out in a practical way. It was a bit of a career limiting option for me, because I would be further away from other Anglican Colleges that I might one day want to get employed by, but I am convinced that God wants me at Springfield for a fair amount of time (don't know how much) and so this was not a problem - in fact it was a plus! I have to admit that I pretty much expected it to work out.

We eventually found a house and had an offer accepted on the very last day that I had on my timeline to get an offer accepted. It was then down to selling our house. We spent a lot of time and money getting it ready for sale and then even more time getting it ready for Saturday open homes. Then we prayed some more. And some more.

The open homes really had nothing positive for us. Just sticky beakers who were doing research. (Not a problem - been there done that!)

So now, we have passed my date for getting our home sold and we are not moving.

I am both happy and sad about this. There is a part of me which is asking the question "Well why did you put me through this God?" I am happy not to have the stress of moving, but I did really like the house we had an offer on. I got the feeling though that it really wasn't about me and my family, but it was actually about a range of other people who needed us in this position. I pray that somehow that somewhere, someone is now closer to God as a result of all of this. If not, well it's not really a problem - I'm just going to keep on doing what I'm doing.

I love my life, my wife, my family, my job, my friends. There is nothing that will stop that. I will continue to work in Springfield as long as God wants me there and as long as I am needed there (They go together by the way). I had a conversation tonight that highlighted to me what a great place it was to work. Not that I needed reminding, but that it was a reminder (like a calendar reminder when you are at the event).

To be faithful to God is not always clear, but its always best.

Cheers
Macca

New to your church - Part 4 Challenge

Welcome back to my New to your church series ... except that Part 4 actually should be left until the new person to your church is ready. This could be after 1 year, it could be after a few years.

Challenge

Here's the thing, you get somebody into church and get them happy and then most people think "Job Done!" But if that is all that happens then you actually fail them...

There are lots of ways to challenge a congregation member or family. One of the most common ways of challenging is to give them a job. I remember a priest telling me that he gave people a job as soon as possible so that you kept them. This was great when everybody responded really well to committment, but these days ... Actually I think he had the cart before the horse, and a number of people who really didn't understand that the Gospel was all about grace managed to get into positions where they used and abused power and people left that church as a result. Having said that, a job is a really good challenge if used according to the gifts/time/experience/spiritual needs of a member. Churches need to remember that the jobs needs to be in the interest of the member, not the church. Just because the lawn needs mowing doesn't mean that the next new bloke goes on the roster. Just because the brass needs polishing doesn't mean the next mum gets put on the cleaning roster. The number of bible verses of serving are quite substantial and I don't need to mention any specifically, but the number of bible verses saying nice things about churches that are "self-serving" is quite a lot less. It is a tricky balancing act.

My current church actually spends some time encouraging people to go through their gifts to work out how they can best contribute to the life of the church. The benefit of finding the right job for someone, is that people are more likely to commit, complete and enjoy doing it. When people complete a job they like doing for the glory of God, they end up feeling affirmed, encouraged, uplifted, and more responsible.

The problem is getting the right attitude. If people are cajoled, manipulated or guilt tripped into jobs you just know its going to end badly - jobs not done, or done badly, or done well with a judgmental attitude, or done well with a scowl. It's just not right. You need to develop a specific culture where people are recognized and encouraged to do jobs for the church. You can't have the priest/pastor do everything, but you can't let people do it in a grumpy way.

Another key way of challenging people is through bible study. Some churches see "young people" (aka under 55s) coming regularly to church and think this means they should be ordained and encourage them to do a Bachelor of Theology. I am all for study, but I'm thinking that maybe some other steps in between might be useful.

Small groups should always be a key aspect of the Church life and regular prayer and bible study should be key features of any small group.

Another way of challenging is through small studies such as Alpha course, Christianity Explained, or Back to Basics. 5-8 weeks is not too much of a commitment and can really help members understand what it is that your Church loves and emphasises... and sometimes what Jesus dying on the cross really means.

Challenging is also a vital step if you want the next part (empower) to be effective. Well-meaning powerful people who don't know why they do what they can be a danger to themselves and everybody. Ephesians 4:12 says that we need to "equip His [Jesus] people for works of service so that the body of Christ may be built up.

If you don't challenge pew warmers with jobs and training, then they will become parasites in the church. We are all called to serve and everyone needs to serve appropriately using their gifts. Challenging people can sound bad, but really, it's in their best interest

Cheers
Macca

What dads say

While I was on my holiday I had to say these things to my boys...

Don't worry, I'm right here.
Just wait!
Could you help me by carrying this?
Just because you can't see it doesn't mean it's not there.
Up you get.
Do you want a hug?
Isn't this amazing?
I told you that if you kept on doing it, eventually it would land on the roof.
You've got to do more than say sorry.

There were lots of times when I asked for help to do things I was quite capable of doing myself. I wasn't being lazy, I was giving them small amounts of responsibility with the opportunity for praise and encouragement.

There were times when they asked me questions that I could have given the real answer to, but they just wouldn't have understood, especially the pyroclastic flow, so I just simplified it.
This exactly the same as my relationship with God. These are all things that he has said to me (especially "just wait!"). Does this mean that I am trying to play God? No. I am just being a Dad who loves his kids. This is the relationship that Jesus says we should have with God when he teaches the disciples to pray.
Unfortunately, this also shows me that when God gently nudges me along, he is actually seeing me as a 3-5 year old: not in a patronizing way, but in a gentle, understanding, caring and eternally patient kind of way.

So go through what I said to the boys; God is saying it to me, and God is probably saying that to you too.

Cheers
Macca

New to your church part 3

In Matthew 9, Mark 2, and Luke 5, we get this great line from Jesus "healthy people don't need a doctor; only the sick people need a doctor." In each of the three Gospels, this has come off the back of a healing of a paralyzed man in which there is a strong link between a physical healing and spiritual healing also known as forgiveness.

My third blog about new people in church is about Healing. Let me be clear here: its both kinds of healing that need to take place. If you've got a family that comes to the church and the Dad's just been laid off and the mum has a got a terminal disease and the kids have got allergies, then you can't ignore that and just attend to the spiritual needs of the family - that would be unloving, unkind and unchristian. But any family in the position is also going to have intense spiritual needs too (not to mention a few questions about suffering and God).

Maybe the new people who turn up don't actually appear to have that much in the way of physical problems. They're DINKs or they have steady well-paid professions in the prime of their life. They turn up for a few weeks and they start making connections and chatting with people after the service - what then?

Anybody who has been in a church for longer than about 10 seconds is going to have spiritual baggage, and probably emotional baggage that goes along with it. Why? Well why have they come to your church if they didn't have baggage? Why did they leave? Why didn't they stay in their perfect little/big church? New job. Ah well no chance that anything bad happened then... but then you have the differences between this church and that, and in the last church they were [       ] and the theology was more [        ] and this is good because [      ] but they miss [       ]. You can fill in the blanks.

Anyone who has been an active member of another church will probably have a few battle scars, a few strong ideas, and possibly even some beliefs that they don't want to reveal. Since there is so much church shopping and sheep stealing these days as the pool of Christians in a post-church society dwindles and the amount of outreach is reduced, the chances are that a lot of new people to your church have had some experience of church and most of that will just be bad.

The "unchurched" in this post-church society need something more than just religious experience and the label of "token young person" to make it worthwhile for them to give up the time and money and coolness that you sacrifice to commit to a church.

All of this is kind of beside the point... Everyone needs the Great Physician (Even Luke). That means that everyone in your church probably needs love, care, help, warmth, TLC, followup and a good bedside manner. New people need this more than anyone in the church, because it takes ages to become regular people, but an instant to become "gone". If Jesus is the Doctor, then I'm thinking we must be the nurses - and yes, this includes changing bedpans.

That means that every new person needs to have several congregation members who are willing, available, trained, equipped, and aware/appointed to take care of them. I have seen lots of services where the new people (sometimes me) are meant to be ministered to by just the minister, which is bad, or they are completely ignored.

If someone was to come to your church with blood coming out of their leg, you'd probably rush over with a bandage and try and patch them up. Why is it that when we see people come into the church we just assume they are okay or we don't need to care for them? Why is it that when we see people come into the church we just assume that the power of the service/sermon/warm handshake/cup of tea afterwards will take care of all their spiritual ailments? I don't know a single person on this planet who does not need at least the question to be asked "Are you okay?" and then the answer that comes afterwards to be pretty much disbelieved, or for someone to look for the opportunity to say "you look like you're having a rough day."

The worst thing is, that we have churches that are full of people who go through the "welcome" and "connect" phases, but then get stuck at "healing". Some of these people were welcomed when they were months old and have been coming ever since. Sure, they keep coming to church. Sure some of their spiritual hurts and ailments are fixed. But then life happens and they just stay in the neediness, or they stick hard and fast to their stoic "I'm okay."

You could take the approach that Jesus is the Doctor, so he should be healing them. Maybe the priest is Jesus' rep on earth and so the priest should do the lion's share of work. What do you end up with? A church full of people who never get properly well, and who mainly focus on their own needs, rather than reaching out, serving, volunteering, evangelizing, or discipling. You can get congregations where everybody knows a lot about the bible, and each one has a deep personal faith, but unless they are involved in the healing process and people get more than just a bandaid, its like anti-cholesterol medication instead of a heart transplant - it will keep you going but you wont get to do star jumps.

The healing comes from Jesus. He achieves this in many different ways, but mostly he is just keen for Christians to realise "Hey Jesus healed me, and now its time for me to give something back." I like the idea of serving as a nurse because the responsibility is God's and I know that he doesn't need me. But I also know that God wants to use us for our own good and for his own glory.

If you agree with this idea that people need to be healed and you are already a part of helping that happen in your church, then you need to find those who have been in the church for a while and encourage them to stop being so self-centered and start looking after the others in the congregation. Everybody needs to grow through the problems that require healing so that they can become effective members of the body of Christ - the sooner the better.

I want all churches to be growing; not because of sheep stealing, or because their version is so flashy so it attracts all the church shoppers, but because people get something out of it, and then invest something back into it.

Cheers
Macca

New to your church part 2

So my recipe went like this ...

Welcome
Connect
Heal
Challenge
Empower

Part 2 is connect

I think this is the area that people think is difficult and therefore leave to the expert with the theology degree, rely on the" quality" of the service or blame the new people for not connecting ("well if they had grown up in the church they would understand...").

Certainly the priest / pastor and the service should connect. A well developed positive message should be preached not just at the sermon but also in the songs and prayers. Its also worth thinking about how the people up the front interact with each other and the people in the congregation. If people up the front get cross with each other for liturgical mistakes and then turn around and talk about forgiveness, how does that look to the new person? That positive message invites the new person to think to themselves "I could see myself coming here..."


It's actually worth thinking about how businesses connect with their customers/clients/demographic/target audience. That doesn't mean that we have to adopt a business attitude, just that we can learn from people who make a living off doing this stuff really well - what's that you say? Priests have to live off the collection plate? Oh, and God's grace and mercy. Well I guess that's an advantage... Anyway, getting off track.

I'm going to look at the big three - Maccas, Bunnings and Coles. They all sell stuff, but they all want your loyalty too which is different from an Ebay store or Harvey Norman which just promise you cheap stuff and get you back even though they have no customer service.

Maccas - their key is consistency. You can go to a Maccas anywhere and know what you'll get, and what you get may not be appetising if you think to hard about it, but it will come with a clean, safe toilet, a playground and it will be really convenient. I don't know how many times using drive through has been an option because I've had boys in the car and its much less hassle to stay in the car and so drive through Maccas becomes the choice. If you've ever been to a petrol station toilet or park with a metal toilet then you'll know how important it is to be able to go to the toilet without being worried about what could happen inside or what could be lacking. Every Maccas has a playground of fairly high, if not very high standard and even though KFC and Hungry Jacks also do this, they don't do it as well as Maccas.

Bunnings - they cover everything. You've got to paint, plant or repair something then you could go to a normal hardware store or you could go to Bunnings and you'll find a couple of other things along the way that you didn't think you needed but it was so cheap ... My local Bunnings has a real Child-friendly push with a brand new massive playground, free balloons, lollipops and stamps and I know I could actually just walk in have the kids play and be able to walk out again without having bought anything, but I probably wouldn't because there is always something to buy. They also offer training courses...

Coles - they focus on quality. I don't always buy it, but they are always going on about quality, and they do a pretty good job of promoting themselves *everywhere*. Is Masterchef about cooking or is it about promoting Coles? I'm not quite sure. I think they've given up on trying to win the "cheapest supermaket" prize since Aldi came on the scene, so they focus on really red shiny apples and fruit and veg areas that make it look like you are at the markets in Melbourne, and shelves full of as few cans as possible.

You generally get a friendly, happy, staff member at these places, and Bunnings has even tried to provide some customer service over the last couple of years. You pretty much know what to expect and there are very strategic locations, advertising, and methods for moving you from choosing to purchasing to staying a bit longer. The most important thing about all of the successful businesses is that they know who they are trying to reach and they have a strategy for getting them and, more importantly, keeping them. Sometimes it is very subtle, but you always know when you have walked out of one of these stores that you have been in the store and that the buying of items was more than just looking at the cheapest prices.

So how about church?
Is your church strategic? or is it desperate to get anyone who walks through the doors?
Does your church have some way of encouraging people to stay longer?
Does your church attract a specific demographic (possibly over 70s) or does it cover all demographics?
What is your church doing to attract new people and what is it doing to keep existing members?
Where is the energy of the programs being focused on - getting in new or keeping old? and how effective is it at either?
What strategies are in place to cater for people once they move from one demographic group to the next (ie young singles to newly marrieds. Marrieds to families. Families to retirees.)?
When a new person comes along to your church, do they leave with a sense of being deliberately acknowledged, affirmed and valued, or that there was a standard that they needed to measure up to?
What key strategies do you have for connecting with kids?
What facilities do you have to connect with kids?
How well do you advertise your church's existence? programs? facilities? ministry?
How well do you advertise the Christian message of love and forgiveness through Jesus, as opposed to religiousness and experience?
What are you doing that creates a disconnect for new people to the church?
Do you ask new people to give money?
Do new people have enough information? Too much information?
Is your service consistent so that people know what they will get? (and are the toilets easily accessible or in the really old block that is about 10m away from the church and you need a key?)
Does your service cover everything and everyone? (Do you get the Gospel message plus theological insight plus opportunities for ministry or just intellectual rigor? Does your service engage high church, low church, people who can't read, people who like singing new songs, people who like to sing old songs? Careful with this as you cannot be all things to all people...)
Who is doing the work of connecting to new people? (Is it people at the door, the priest, Fred who has a very outgoing personality, people with name tags on, or just God?)
Do you pray for new people to come to your church?
Do you pray that people will connect when they come to your church?
Do the existing members want any new people to come to church? Why? Why not? What kind of new people?

I think I will do an extra blog later on with my tips for talking to new people. I should just add that churches in general are hopeless at advertising themselves. No-one reads the local free newspaper anymore, and letterbox drops are time-consuming and about 5% effective. Hillsong has the best advertising of any church in Australia, but at times you could interpret their blatant advertising as some sort of selling of the soul (that's probably a little harsh). The best advertising is always word of mouth, followed by strategic visuals and branding in the right places... its not rocket science, and churches shouldn't just say "If we pray for them they will come?" You can't just wait for your Christmas carols or Easter service - it has to be regular and prominent in your community.

My concluding comments on this topic are
1. Be strategic
2. Know who you can cater for and how you can cater for them
3. Change what you do, rather than who you are
4. Make sure that you take advice from God and the Holy Spirit - this is the difference between church and business.

Next blog is on healing, which doesn't mean I think new people should get a miracle healing, but is going to be about brokeness, sinfulness, dealing with the past and restoration/redeeming.

I'm a kindy Dad

Because of the overlap between TSAC holidays and Owen's holidays, I got to go to Kindy today.

I love Owen's Kindy because it is so well run, the teachers are fantastic and the kids are nice. I've never seen other Kindies so I have nothing to compare it to, but I bet if I did, I wouldn't be as impressed.

Now obviously there were other things I could have done today - fix the fence, paint some walls, play CODmw2 or continuously pick toys after Harry played with them for about a second - but this is what I really wanted to do. It's not the first time I've been able to do it; last year and this year I have spent a few hours there and even played my violin for the kids.

This time it really struck me how keen most of the kids were to spend time with me. I honestly don't know if their Dad's don't get to spend much time with them so they are starved for attention, or if they are used to getting attention from adults, I was an adult and I attended. But I was the centre of attention for most of the day. (I actually think the teachers didn't mind a bit of a break.)

All I was doing was playing with my son and anyone else who cared to join in, which was up to a dozen kids at a time. It wasn't intellectual, it wasn't academic, it wasn't psychologically analytical - it was just a bit of fun... and it felt great!

More importantly, Owen felt affirmed in his relationship with me. He knows I love him. But does it really hurt to emphasise the point "I LOVE YOU!" No, of course not. So I did everything I could to make that happen. The sad part from me is that I suspect that there are many kids out there who believe intellectually that their parents love them, but just don't get the affirmation that leads to the emotional belief that their parents love them. Too much work, not enough time is not a solution for any relationship and I think that sometimes our kids are so forgiving of our failings that we don't see how much they miss us and just want to be with us and be like us.

I strongly believe that our earthly relationships mimic our heavenly relationships. God taught us to call him "daddy" (not "that guy with the smite key and a long flowing beard) and wants to be with us all the time. The trouble is, most of the time we act like kids who have learnt their Dad is not available except at certain times, and who goes away on long trips overseas.

What did I learn from Kindy today?
sit down and turn your listening ears on
wash your hands
have a drink when your teacher tells you
have a guess
use friendly hands
create something
Your teacher is watching over you while during nap time
Kids love to copy so set a good example and follow a good example
Encourage everyone
When someone is sad, sometimes just sitting with them helps them feel better
Don't use toilet words
When kids know that a Dad is okay, they flock to him

Who would have thought I could learn so much in one day?

New to your church

This is my recipe for the process that people (should) go through so that when they church shop and find a church they like they keep on coming back and become a part of the community. Like all recipes it will probably need tweaking to taste and there will be times when you have to substitute an ingredient depending on what is in your pantry. I say recipe, but everyone knows that a simple formula just wont get the job done - it takes a lot of work, a lot of heart, and the work of the Holy Spirit. I would be very interested in feedback so feel free to comment.

Ingredients
Welcome
Connect
Heal
Challenge
Empower

Welcome
This is not just having someone at the entrance to the church with a friendly smile. This means making sure that anyone new can find everything and know everything they need to. Sometimes the information needs to be conveyed through well positioned signs, sometimes it is given by the welcomer at the front, sometimes it comes from people who sit around the new person, sometimes it comes from the person leading the service or their assistants. This includes knowing things like which page to turn to, which book to use, where the toilets are, what information in the pew bulletin might interest them or be helpful (bible readings that are used in the service or a sermon intro or what events are coming up that might suit them) or just giving them some way in which they can ask for help during the service.

Welcoming children and parents takes a specific skill because they don't necessarily fit into the normal church. What options have you got for children and for which specific age ranges? Do you have a feeding room with change facilities? Do you have a time in the service when the kids come up to the front? Do you have a time when the kids leave the service for an alternative program like Sunday School? Are all the helpers with children blue carded and trained for whatever roles they take and do the new parents know? How is all this information conveyed? What do you do when you don't cover every single age range and someone turns up with kids in the range you cover and kids in the range you don't cover?

The key to all of this is that you don't want the newcomer to feel embaressed by the fact that they are new and don't know anything. All of this information does not need to be conveyed as soon as someone new comes through the door because that would give them information overload. What does need to happen is that the whole congregation needs to consider how they respond when someone new turns up. It must be a very clear strategy that everyone knows about, even if they don't have to do anything.

In ages past, when people were brought up in the church, and church services varied little, a warm smile from other congregation members was enough to welcome newcomers because the information was "obvious". Things like when to sit and stand, which page to turn to and send you kid out just before the sermon were pieces of information that could be worked out using the wealth of knowledge from years of church attendance. In a largely unchurched population, the few that do turn up in the pews don't necessarily have the information to decode the *obvious* and we lose a lot of opportunities when people randomly turn up because it is too scary, too intellectual and literate, too embaressing, too obvious that you are new, and much easier just to stay at home. It cannot be covered by the priest/pastor/leader if there are any more than about 10 people - there is just too much which can put people off.

Finally, a warm smile can be encouraging, but staring at someone's tattoos, thongs-singlet combo and turning your nose away because the newcomer didn't have a shower this week can be devestating. People who don't understand the dresscode probably already feel uncomfortable enough as it is, without the bodylanguage, percieved whispers about them, and *blanking* which makes them feel judged, whether its from the priest or anyone in the congregation. If the welcome isn't good enough, it won't necessarily put off the seriously committed Christian, but unchurched non-christians who are responding to the call of God, or the guilt of Grandma will probably run out the door - never to be seen again because they have been innoculated (a small bad dose protects against a full-blown version taking hold) against the Church and against Christ.

Next - Connect: Not an evangelical sermon series or bible college course, but an attitude.

Cheers
Macca

The end is nigh

I just cannot wait for tomorrow afternoon!
I have had a pretty big term and I just need a proper sleep... (I know - never going to happen when I've got two small boys)
I noticed that the further we went on, the grouchier, crankier, and more irritated people got. If (and this is a big if) we have 100% tolerance at the beginning of a term, by the end most people must be just about out of it.

So how do you avoid flaming all your friends when we get tired?

My answer is simple, by having people around you to keep it in perspective. In my office we all work together to make it a nice place to work. When things get tiring and crazy, we are always there for each other with reassuring words.

So the question is ... Who is around you that helps you keep things in perspective? I guess another important question is ... Who are around your friends and loved ones when things get tough?

Another glorious holiday awaits - going to take my family to a farm where there will be much animal feeding and cuteness!

Cheers
Macca